Calen,
You need to remember a few very important things in life, especially that you should not change your life plans for anyone else. That is just how you end up being let down and feeling guilty. Make plans and keep them. Do not change your plans for someone, because chances are they will change their plans on you, and you will be the one left alone. Even when you think they are different and they will feel bad, they won't, and they won't come back for you, so stick to your guns, do what's best for you, and be happy. Nothing will make you happier than doing something for yourself, regardless of how tough it may be, or how much it hurts at the time. Pick your future plans only based on yourself, because you can't expect someone else to change their plans for you and you need to look out for what's best for you. It is scary growing up and having to make possibly the first real adult decisions that will forever affect your future, but that's just it-its your future, so you have to do it for you. No one else can tell you what the future holds or how you should handle it, so when you pick your own route, you must be accountable for it and learn to keep your chin up and deal with it. Life is rough, but what doesn't kill you always makes you stronger, so be independent; you always have been, don't change now.
<3
